New awesome statuses for facebook and whatsapp. Are you looking for Best Awesome Status Quotes? We are giving Large Collection of Short Awesome Status. I trust you guys are going to love this collection. You will get all the Latest and refreshed gathering of unique, Awesome Status Messages.
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AWESOME STATUSES FOR FACEBOOK
May your life someday be as good as you make it out to be on Facebook.
LIKE if you hate it when someone tags you in a photo, you look horrible in because they happen to look so good in it.
Phew! Thank you, warning label. I was actually considering using my toaster in the shower this morning.
Looking at school books and thinking: what a waste of a tree!
Nobody around here treats me like a glamour model, so I’m just going to sit here taking selfies by myself.
Why didn’t you reply to my text? Well, how am I supposed to reply to LOL?
Line dancing was originally invented by women waiting in line for the bathroom.
Don’t tell me the sky’s the limit when there are footprints on the moon.
Nothing is illegal. Until you get caught.
Friends are like boobs: some are real, some are fake.
I just don’t know how to react when someone sends me a selfie. I mean, should I say “Wow! You really got yourself at the perfect angle in that restroom!”
That moment when the random person you just met asks for your full name, and you know it’s because they want to stalk you on Facebook.
The hardest things our kids will do in 20-30 years is finding a username which isn’t already taken.
I’m a good girl. With a lot of bad habits.
Aren’t we ALL internet explorers?
I’ve been known to flash people (with my camera).
If Twitter wasn’t around in the olden days why is there a hashtag button on landlines?
I press all the “Try Me” buttons on toys and then walk away LIKE A BOSS.
Me without you is like Facebook with no friends, YouTube with no videos, and Google with no results.
Girls are beautiful, not hot. They are not a temperature.
Dear friends, please don’t tag me in a photo that is so prehistoric you have to scan the photo to make it digital. No one here is into studying history, sincerely everybody born before 2010.
Don’t think too much or you could create a problem that wasn’t even there.
Without candy crush, I’d be like a kid with no candy!
Telling me you’re going to unfollow me is like announcing you’re leaving a party you weren’t even invited to.
I did not say I didn’t want to work. I said I didn’t want to twerk!
Cheese. Milk’s leap towards evolution.
My mum’s so old-fashioned she thinks LOL = Lots of love. She sent me an SMS saying just to let you know you’re Pa is in the hospital LOL.
I’m following you on Twitter because my mum always told me to follow my dreams.
Everyone is normal until you find them on Twitter.
Tired? There’s a nap for that.
Birthdays are good for your health. Studies show those who have more Birthdays live longer.
Food is an important part of a balanced diet.
When I get a pimple on my tongue, I always feel guilty in case I’ve told a white lie.
I dance like a car dealerships inflatable tube man.
I tried being normal once. Most boring hour of my life.
You didn’t notice that that I used a word twice in this sentence.
A fact of life: After Monday and Tuesday even the calendar says W T F.
The first five days after the weekend are always hard.
I am 100% done with today and about 37% done with tomorrow.
At first, I didn’t like my beard; then it grew on me.
Broken pencils are pointless.
“What’s up cake?” “Muffin much.”
I don’t have goals. Goals are for soccer. I’m not soccer.
Every time I put my phone on silent, it decides to play “hide and seek.”
You put the “pro” in “procrastination.”
I don’t have exes; I have Y’s. Y the hell did I do that?
I have decided to tell my pets they’re adopted.
If swimming is an exercise, then explain whales to me.
If someone says “I love you,” and you don’t feel the same way, just say “I love YouTube” really fast.
Only 10-20% of the population can wiggle their ears and raise one eyebrow.
We should stop teaching kids to sing the alphabet. It took me five years to realize that “elemeno” wasn’t a letter.
Unicorns do exist. They’re just fat and grey, and we call them Rhinos.
A message in the toilet: Treat me well, keep me clean, I will not tell anyone what I have seen.
I grew up being told not to write on the walls. Felt like such a badass when I first joined Facebook.
My wallet is like an onion, when I open it. It makes me cry.
Life is like a box of chocolates: if you eat the whole thing at once you’re going to be sick.
Can I take your picture?? I love to collect pictures of natural disasters.
The only reason god made cousins so that parents can compare our marks.
People say laughter is the best medicine. Your face must be curing the world.
When life gets tough, remember: You were the strongest sperm.
The difference between pizza and your opinion is that I asked for pizza.
Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is the husband!
I don’t always lose my phone but when I do its always on silent.
I really need a day in between Saturday and Sunday.
I don’t want to earn my living, I want to live.
Eight letters, three words, one regret. I miss you.
I miss your smile but I miss my own even more.
Behind my smile is everything you’ll never understand.
I still miss him, I miss him, I’m missing him.
The only normal people you know are the ones you don’t know very well.
Life is a mirror and will reflect back to the thinker what he thinks into it.
When I drink alc0h0l.. Everyone says I’m alc0h0lic. But.. When I drink Fanta. No one says I’m fantastic.
Why do parents get so upset about little things like goddamn I left a plate in the sink, not a dead body.
I’ve found the recipe for happiness. Can someone just send me some money so that I can buy the ingredients?
Anyone else sits on the toilet and play with their phone until you realized you have been finished 10 minutes ago?
Money can’t buy happiness, but it pays for the internet, which is pretty much the same thing.
I’m not single, I’m just romantically challenged.
The funniest thing in class is when the teacher cracks a joke and no one laughs.
The annoying moment when the TV commercials are so long that you forget what you’re watching.
Remember, there are two words in life that will open a lot of doors for you. Push and Pull.
If you love something, let it go. If it comes back, it was meant to be. If it does not, hunt it down & kill it.
I hate when I am about to hug someone really s3xy and my face hits the mirror.
Those who say money can’t buy happiness are shopping at the wrong places.
Oooooh, that’s a bit too harsh. Let me put a ‘lol’ at the end of it.
Dear iPhone, Please stop changing my rude words into nice ones. You piece of shut.
I enjoy long romantic walks to the fridge.
Our language is called the mother tongue because the father never gets a chance to Speak.
When your ex asks if you can still be friends right after a breakup, it’s like having a kidnapper tell you to keep in touch.
Taking revenge is wrong..very very wrong.. But very very fun.
That awesome moment, when You say something funny in class and everyone laughs at it n then you sit there like a Legend..
That feeling when you enter to a store & they play your favorite song 🙂
That Awesome Moment When You carry someone’s baby & they refuse to go back to their parent’s hands just because they like you.
The awesome feeling you get when people remember small details about you. 🙂
It’s awesome .. when someone understands u more than u..! 🙂
That awesome moment, when you try to overtake a girl on scooty .and all of a sudden she decides to Race with you 😀
That Awesome Moment, When You Find A Free WiFi In Public Places.. 😀
Awesome Feeling, Being so close with someone that you insult each other all the time and never get offended. ^_^
That Amazing Moment. When YOu DrOp YOur PhOne.. But, The HeadphOnes Save Its Life.. ^_-
That awesome moment when we bunkers get more marks !! Than attenders 😀 😉
An awesome moment: when you update your status with somebody in your mind and that person like your status first.
That ‘Awesome moment’, when you see someone’s status, and you know it’s aimed at you 🙂
Trust me, when I woke up today I had no plans to be awesome. It just happens. They ignore you now, but they will need you later.
If you realize that you spend nice moments beside someone, that means that your heart loves that person.
I hope life isn’t a big joke, because I don’t get it
Life is like a beautiful melody, only the lyrics are messed up
Honesty is the best gift you can give.
When I joke they take it seriously. When I am serious they take it as a joke..
I like crazy people, especially those who don’t see the risk.
Best conversations always happen late in the night. 🙂
The best thing about a picture is that it never changes even when the people in it do.
Someday somewhere somehow I & you will be together.
Love is not something you say and it happens. It is a feeling that is felt deep in the heart and I feel it for you
Every single thing that has ever happened in your life is preparing you for a moment that is yet to come.
They say “don’t drink and drive”. Well.. yesterday I was drinking a juice box while riding my tricycle. Yeah. I’m a badass.
That moment when a question on a test is so hard that even your inner voice is like “f*ck this shit lets work at McDonald’s”.
It’s funny how all trust goes away when you can’t find the remote. “Are you sitting on the remote?” No. “Stand up”.
The awesome moment, when, you upload a status just for one particular person, and that person coincidentally is the first one to LIKE that status..!! 🙂
The Awesome moment.. When u r telling A Joke but can’t finish it Because of Your laughing too hard.. The friend says: You better laugh before 😛
Some of the best lessons we ever learn we learn from our mistakes and failures. The error of the past is the wisdom of the future.
Life is not about finding yourself its about creating yourself.
It’s only murder if they find the body, Otherwise it’s a missing person..Just a thought.
It Doesn’t Matter Where You Came From. All That Matters Is Where You Are Going..
Nothing can hold you back in your life other than your insecurities.
If Stress Burned Calories, I’D Be A Supermodel.
When I drink alcohol… Everyone says I’m an alcoholic. But… When I drink Fanta. No one says I’m fantastic.
If you don’t go after what you want, you’ll never have it. If you don’t ask, the answer is always no. If you don’t step forward, you’re always in the same place.
Don’t try and perfect yourself for one person wait for the One who love your Imperfection.
The greatest mistake you can make in life is to be continually fearing you will make one.
Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail…
The difference between pizza and your opinion is that I asked for pizza.
Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. Explore. Dream. Discover.